Healthy Divorce
Begins Here

Parents who use divorce mediation have better relationships with their children than parents who litigate."

- Relationships with children are better

(Emery, 2004)

Litigation increases trauma and escalates conflict."

- Mediation is better for children

(Saccuzzo, 2003)

Conflict, not the divorce itself, causes long-term harm to children.”"

- It's the conflict, not the divorce

(Rheinstein, 1972, as cited in Saposnek, 1998)

The more overt the parental conflict, the more disturbed children are likely to be."

- Less conflict means healthier children

(Johnson, 1989, as cited in Bricklin, 2000)

When parents continued fighting after the divorce … children had a great deal of difficulty accepting and integrating the divorce."

- Mediation prevents psychological harm

(Wallerstein & Kelly, 1980, as cited in Saposnek, 1998)

Children of 'high conflict litigants' endure distortions of self-image, passivity, impaired functioning, distorted perspectives about life events, and difficulties in 'initiating or completing tasks,' 'sustaining intimacy,' and 'relating to others'."

- Mediation diffuses divorce wars

(Bricklin, B. & Elliot G. 2000 as cited in Sauer, J. J. 2007)

An estimated two million children in the United States over the past two decades have been caught in an endless cycle of their parents’ high-conflict litigation 'passing in and out of a revolving court door'."

- Mediation avoids litigation's harm on children

(Sauer, J. J. 2007)

Mediation helps spouses better transition to their new co-parenting roles in a healthy way, which helps kids adjust."

- Mediation supports healthy co-parenting

(Saposnek, 1998)

When children are frequently coerced or cajoled into taking sides in parental battles, [this] creates a terrible conflict in them of divided loyalties. Such a tug-of-war greatly compounds children’s difficulties."

- Mediation prevents a tug-of-war

(Wallerstein & Kelly, 1980, as cited in Saposnek, 1998)

The better that a parent is able to adjust after divorce, the better a child will be able to adjust. When parents provide a stable environment … children are able to successfully adjust and cope with their parents’ separation."

- Co-parenting helps kids adjust

(Saposnek, 1998)

Conflict is harmful only if the child never experiences the parents resolving it. When parents 'compromise,' children avoid the 'poorer adjustment' that comes from continuous 'verbal attacking.'"

- Resolving conflict is everything

(Camara & Resnick, 1989, as cited in Saposnek, 1998)

The deleterious effects of interparental conflict on children … during the marital separation and after the divorce has been so amply documented that it has become commonplace knowledge…"

- Parents support children by choosing mediation

(Emery, 1988, as cited in Saposnek, 1998; Grych & Fincham, 1990; et al.)

A central cause of children’s poor adjustment post-divorce at five years after the divorce was the failure of the divorce to provide the intended relief."

- Lower conflict protects children

(Wallerstein & Kelly, 1980, as cited in Saposnek, 1998)

When children 'suffer heightened levels of anxiety' resulting from their parents’ divorce conflict, they develop a shrunken 'sense of self-worth,' act more aggressively, and are terrified of their parents’ aggressiveness while oppositely imitating it."

- Mediation reduces negative effects

(Bricklin & Elliot, 2000)

Children whose parents engaged in 'high levels of conflict' were found to be overly aggressive or insecure. Witnessing hostility between parents led to aggressive behavior in children for several years following divorce."

- Mediation mitigates conflict

(Bricklin, 1995)